Halloween

Usually my foray into blog-posting winds up being a somewhat emotional experience - whether it be solely pertaining to my emotions regarding my circumstances in life, my reaction to books or movies (the two so far... more to come as I see more movies (not so much on the book side until after my FINAL application is complete later today)), or even a political opinion. Today, on the other hand, I've simply come to inform you that I've topped the list of the shittiest Halloween costume ever created. It is a hazmat suit. In which I will run around with a pair of scissors in each hand screaming at children. Scary? Yes. But what the fuck?!

This is the latest addition to a trend of mine that has progressed since I was in elementary school: every year, my costume just gets shittier and shittier. Last year, I dressed as a douchebag. That was my costume. See: picture. Anyway, I really hope this trend quits in time for college, where I actually intend to have a social life. And get into college. We'll see.

P.S. The nametag says "Chad" and I drew fake abs onto myself.

The Ride

Marching band has probably been the most influential activity I've participated in in my entire life. Without it, I wouldn't have most of the friends that I do now; I wouldn't be a good musician. I would have spent my summer at home, playing video games and watching TV. 2 years ago, at the beginning of my would-be first day of band camp, I was planning on maybe going to the movies or else staying at home in my pajamas. I wasn't at all planning on doing marching band, since it seemed like it wouldn't be worth the time or effort - I already had enough things on my mind. I got a call from my friend telling me to come to the school immediately, without telling me why or giving a reason - just that it was important. I showed up at the school at noon... to band camp? And stayed with it for the next three years. A year and a half after that day, I was a member of Legends Drum & Bugle Corps. Only a year and a half and I was devoting my entire summer to something to which I previously wouldn't devote a few hours after school each day. My closest friends are the people who I've shared these experiences with... which is what made Friday one of the most bittersweet moments of my life.

Everything is changing in life. I'm preparing to exit - to uproot myself from my current life and make one for myself. Chances are I won't know any of the same people within a year, and I'll be new to every experience. Friday night was my last performance as a member of my high school's marching band. I'll never play another note as a member of the ensemble that essentially raised me to become the person I am today... which is infinitely better than the person I was before. Before, I was a retarded 14 year old. Now I'm a retarded 17 year old, and that's a huge difference. I'm no longer a meandering, depressed, shy little boy. I'm a confident, social, happy young man... but my firm grasp on life that it took me this long to gain is about to be yanked away in exchange for something completely different. I'm scared shitless.

Imagine my face on one of those Barack Obama "Progress" Posters

Because I've applied to three colleges and already accepted at one. It was only my safety that let me in so far, but... it's good to see that I got into my safety school at the very least. As I predicted, as high school finds itself in full swing, all sorts of drama is created around me while I remain out of the loop (for which I am grateful) but yet still pressured to give advice. While new relationships form, old relationships die, and new crushes are created and old ones reawakened, I remain in a constant state. I usually hate this once winter rolls around, but fall is always the best time to simply enjoy life. That is, while school is going on anyway. Of course summer is the proper time for fulfilling your dreams.

Anyway, I've also had to weed my way through a bunch of shit lately, which I'll elaborate on shortly. Stay tuned (I'm missing school right now to finish an essay for a scholarship, so I shouldn't really be dicking around.)

The Lifestyle

A two week gap without posting... while a lot has happened in these two weeks worth making an extended blog post, I can't help feel that the distance between posts signifies my fulfillment of a facet of a stereotypical white man: Making a blog for a few months, mostly scattered with posts about how "I'm sorry for not posting in a long time" and then eventually forgetting that it ever existed. What a shame.

Anyway, it most be noted that a week from this post, the marching band placed first in Class A competition at our first tournament of the year. For that, I am extremely proud. What I am upset about is the fact that we have reached the point where the activity is no longer fun but a big bundle of stress and bullshit to weed through. It has happened every year and the last two rehearsals since then have been... stressful and full of bullshit.

However, other things seem to have been going well. I've re-realized the amount of silent support I have from my friends. I've gone a long time without needing any, but after a shitty band rehearsal left me doubting my abilities as a leader and the relevancy of an entire summer, I was pleased to find that this support had never left. I gave one of my friends the gift of a mix CD which I have been so meticulously preparing for the last month and a half. I even attempted to remix it before giving it to her, but I realized at 3 am the night before that I am hopeless at screwing with audio. I might go into more detail about the subject of my audio escapades at some later date.  Not now though - my music preferences seem to change so often that trying to pin it down into one post seems incredibly futile.

Speaking of last night, I have a recipe for having one of the most enjoyable Friday nights when there is shitty weather. Rent kung-fu movies, and proceed to watch without English subtitles whilst making up your own dialogue. It ended up being the most nerdgasmic experiences I've had in a good while in the midst of my continual stress over getting into college.

Another thing about college: This Wednesday I attended my school's college night, where I was excited to meet one of the representatives from the College of Engineering at the University of Michigan. Since she was also on the scholarship committee, I tried to impress her with my status as a National Merit Semifinalist, to which I was told "Yeah, we don't give out scholarships for National Merit. Asshole," and then when I asked about class sizes, the response was basically "FUCK YOU FOR ASKING," since it is a gigantic school.

Essentially, life is going on as normal; I've lost interest in anything that doesn't affect me at the moment, so forgive me if I'm just being boring.